From my thesis, I deduce that people do not like to fight in the rain. All conflicts can thus be solved by spraying people with a hose.

As humans, we probably should have realized this when we started to domesticate animals. Don’t people spray their dogs with water when they’ve done something bad? (I swear I’ve seen this done before). Why didn’t we ever think to do this with humans?

“Ok Israel and Palestine, you are going to be friends or I am going to squirt BOTH of you!”
*squabble squabble*
“OK that’s it!” *gets out super-soaker*
*conflict ends*

That’s how I envision it and THAT’S why I should be prime minister.

 

p.s. I realize that there is absolutely no context for this since I said neither what my thesis is about nor how I went about studying this problem. Just trust me as you do all politicians.

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